i'm a dreamer.

so what if homecoming is more than a month away?
i can still look at cute dresses.
three months prior to prom i already was looking for my dress and had my hairstyle picked out.
and i also bought my dress a month and a half before.
however, i did have a dashing date then.
and at the moment, i have nobody to swoon over.
regardless.



j. crew of course.
dream dress.
i don't mind the hefty price tag.
that's why it's called a dream (=

now that i finally have my own job i can actually buy my own dress, buy my own shoes.
i have an actual dress i want to buy. maybe i'll wait for my pay check in a week-ish.

i'm just praying for a date.
i am single gentlemen.

i wish i was this cool.

this will make your day.
for sure.

in my skin tight jeans.

i go through phases of things i obsess over.

i obsessed over audrey hepburn movies, vintage chairs, purple, my hair, and many other things.

right now.

i'm obsessed with clothes. i can't enough. i look through my catalogs, watch project runway, and organize my closet so i can make my clothes look the best in my closet.

i used to just wear my obviously baggy skinny jeans and dingy white v-necks.

i've been trying to get my "style" together after almost having a breakdown in the middle of the mall when i couldn't find one single thing that i wanted to buy.

i haven't really liked forever 21 as much lately. it's been too weird and i could never find anything. i decided to go in there anyway and maybe i'll find something. brady was pissed at me that i didn't buy anything yet and he had to be back to watch kaylee play soccer. 

i felt bad and i hauled some nice cheap jeans to the dressing rooms. one size was too big and the other size was on the tight side. screw it. i'm buying tight jeans. i'm only young once right?

and i grabbed a grey shirt. a size too big.

i found it. my style.

baggy shirt. tight jeans. so boss.

and a shirt with lace?

i don't think i've ever worn lace in. my. life.

i've finally broken out of my white t-shirts.

and i bought these shoes.

yeah.. i'm cool.

i've been wanting shoes like this foreverrrr

but i would die for a classic long trench coat.

i can't wait to wear my new blazer. it's been too hot.

i think the heat should go. now.

hhhhh

on my first day of AP biology i expected not to have any friends
i was soo ready to just study and do my homework. and possibly make small talk to the nice girl next to me.
i was just fine the second day. i was ready to go crazy on my notes. i was ready to soak in all the biology that i could. i do like biology.
however as i was pulling out my notebook especially for my detailed biology notes, i heard a familiar voice. a not welcome, gorgeous, familiar voice. the voice i longed for every second of everyday for seven months. i was scared to look up. i didn't want to make eye contact. i thought i was in the clear for all eight periods.
i began pulling out books and notebooks that i didn't need and putting them back so i wouldn't have to look up.
he finally sat down. never meeting eyes. i think the feelings were mutual between us.
i could feel the booming in my chest. and even just thinking about it brings it back.
two rows in front of me, we wouldn't meet eyes again, unless he turned around.
it made me sick that i couldn't stop staring at the back of his head.
i literally could. not. stop.
i'm not pathetic.
i'm not a creep.
okay yes i am pathetic
-sigh-

workin hard or hardly workin.

today, would be considered my first day on the job

when i first arrived at simply splendid

(beautiful store, it's on state street in lindon over by juice press and magleby's)

i loved the ladies there. there all so fun especially my aunt dana.

i have to deliver packages every monday, wednesday and friday to the MTC and sometimes local deliveries.

first of all, MTC.

i felt weird just driving up to the place where i said goodbye to my big brother nine months ago.

i couldn't find the mailroom

maryann explained it perfectly and even drew me a cute little picture and yet i found myself wandering around asking multiple missionaries where to go.

let me just say, i adore missionaries. they were all so nice to me, and smiling and opening doors for me. i don't know if they were just nice to me because i had two big boxes that said "MTC COOKIES"

i had two other tins of cookies to deliver to people who worked at UVU. but no address and no class number or building name. i had to find this old guy who, bless his heart, tried his darndest.

turns out both of the offices were off campus.

at least i get happy looks when people find out their getting cookies.

who wouldn't be happy if they were delivered cookies?

i defintely would.

diiiiiiiiiiinggg

i know it's so overrated to make a cliche school post,
you know, the usual, i hate school, i wish it would end.
blah blah blah

yeah i don't enjoy some things about school, like when i have a class with a bunch of people that are friends with each other, and none are friends with me. it does damage on my self esteem.
when miss smithson doesn't call my name, i have a little panic attack and feel relief when she told me she skipped my name.
my government and citizenship teacher is a head case. i was a teensy bit late and she gave me the dirtiest stare down. sorry that i couldn't find your room.
AP calculus just might kill me
also if one more adult asks me if i'm excited for school or excited that i'm in school, i just might flip a bi.

but..
i do love writing with my new pen, whispering with shalee in the back of the class, monsieur burnah, making friends with some cute sophomores in interior design. actually feeling like i'm doing something during the day. the millions of people i like in seminary.

OH and i sort of got a job.
i'm just making deliveries for my aunt's store to the MTC e'ry monday, wednesday and friday. so if you have something you want to send there, slip me a couple bucks and i'll take it for you.

word.

i called it.

ba-boom!

finally

i picked emily henderson from the very first episode

her new show?

it's going to be soo boss.

holler.

parlez vous gossip?

sorry i couldn't resist
i just watched this video
biggest sigh of relief.
i thought chuck was dead.
blair and chuck must be together.
first episode in paris?
yes please.
september 13th please come faster.

not too shabby.

i'm sorry, i didn't get in a fight.
i didn't have enough rage inside of me.
the game wasn't very intense so it was just.. boring.
maybe at the af game.

the game was somewhat well played. timpview is a very good team and our vikings held their own.
i'm just ready for school.

and you can say hi to me whenever you want cailey (=

design star finale tomorrow, i was reading an interview with emily and if she could design for any tv show, she would design for gossip girl, she would design for my favorite show. she is the bomb shizzle.

ikea and football.

yesturday.
lisa and i drove to ikea.
i've been dying for a trip.
i didn't even tell my parents, i just left. i felt so independent and empowered.
lisa..

well sometimes i can't take her in public.
the constant harry potter references and unlatching a pole in the wardrobe section, making clothes and hangers crash to the ground everywhere can sometimes to do some damage to my rep.

but nevertheless, she is still my bes fran.

i never realized how much i miss riding scooters. and swinging on tire swings.

three seventeen year old girls isn't a good idea on tire swings.
first of all, we don't fit very well. second, sometimes one feels sick and tries to bail out but again we don't fit very well so it makes two fall out in the dirt and the swing will come around and smack one in the face, giving her a fat lip.
sorry lise.

tonight is the timpview game. i do love football. i tend to transform into a different type of person while i watch football.

last year at the other timpview game was one to go down in the books,
some girls while we were walking out starting mouthing off to me.
"pg sucks!" but because i really do truly, bleed blue. nobody talks about my school that way.
"i'm sorry who just won?" shoving that in her face might shut her whiny 14 year old mouth.
"we let you win!"
something inside of me snapped. WE LET you WIN?
i started walking towards and i was so blind with fury, i forgot what i said
who says something like that? especially when you probably don't even go to high school?
someone grabbed my arm pulling me back, i tried to resist. but i just. couldn't.

maybe this year will be my year for a good fight.

emily henderson, hero.

on sunday was a long awaited design star episode.

i don't think anybody realizes how amazing this show really is.

they were down to three

casey, michael and emily.

emily is definitely my pick. i love her whole personality and most of all her style.

she always wears blue. and i. love. blue.

on this past show they each designed an individual sun room.

glass walls and glass ceiling.

this is emily's room

i would die for that couch and wallpaper (which by the way is fabric)

 with that room, how could you not move on to the final episode?

so she did.

boss.

michael and emily, final two.

even more awesome, emily has her own blog.

she blogs about the episode after it happens, behind the scenes ish.

and if you're into the whole designing thing (like me)

it's an amazing design blog.

at the drive-in.

today i was watching a cheesy low-budget mtv movie about a girl who bumped into a club owner who just conveniently bought a hotel to make into another club.

they got talking and the girl suggested making a disco.

basic watered down story line.

anywhoo

this reminded me of my future amibition, and i'm going to need some good investors, so hear me out.

everytime i see grease and the drive-in theater scene comes on i think..

"wow why aren't there any more drive-in theaters?"

i've always wanted to go to one.

here's my idea

big drive-in theater but we don't play newly released movies

you can go to any old movie theater and see those and sometimes there just aren't any good movies out.

let's face it, some movies in this generation are corporate flops that are just made to advertise cell phones and cars and overpay overrated actors that frankly, aren't that great at acting.

don't get me wrong, i do love some of the new movies.

we play strictly the classics.

casablanca, footloose, breakfast at tiffany's, the little mermaid, saturday night fever, any other movie you could think of. 

and we'll design it after the 1950's basic theater.

who's in??

the night of girls.

in my family, the children order goes boy, girl, boy, boy.

yes i am the girl

i grew up in a testosterone filled dirty mess.

instead of painting my nails, i played soccer with my brothers.

most of our family nights ended with us wrestling each other.

i didn't always get the girly filled nights.

so when i get invited to one, i'm ecstatic.

most people would think it'd be weird spending a whole night with your ex-boyfriend's sisters,

but it was completely opposite.

they still felt like my sisters.

a dinner filled with some nice girl talk.

walking the mall and hitting every chocolate store.

packing in a ton of chocolate and gummy dinosaurs.

more girl talk.

watching three hours of project runway.

waking up to waffles with whipped cream and strawberries.

even more girl talk.

and confessions of a shopoholic.

once again. another great sleepover.

"oh i forgot about the pouches..."

you see.. lisa, robyn and i
well we're just not normal
we drive around for an hour looking for a house where a party is being held, then once we find it, we declare victory and drive home and watch gilmore girls instead
when we do go to parties, we end up in our own little circle, sometimes a couple people join us but then leave us to our threesome of awesomeness.

last night since there was this hub-bub about a meteor shower
we decided to wild it out and have a sleepover outside in a tent
we finished out pictureka puzzle then outside to put up the tent
sounds easy enough, i am a master of putting up girls camp tents for five, i mean six years
it took us twenty minutes just to figure out how to make the dang thing stand up
and once we did find it
"oh yeah.. now i remember"
thanks robyn you are a lot of help

lisa has a problem, she can't sleep on the ends, she always has to sleep in the middle
we were laid out so one of our friends could squeeze in and robyn and lisa could both sleep in the middle, win-win
however our friend "couldn't make it"
and lisa was left on the edge.
we wouldn't let her in the middle. she left pouting and then jumped back in headfirst
i had her in a headlock for a little while.
she eventually got middle.
what a baby.

by now it was about midnight and we stayed up talking and looking for some meteors.
i saw two.
at approximately one o'clock we hear  some banging on our tent
and then that sweet south african accent
"i've come to read you a bedtime story"
yes indeed, lisa's mom read us the little match girl and then we went to sleep

it was one of my favorite sleepovers.

suit up.

have you noticed in old movies men are always wearing suits?

they're either in their dashing dark suits or in their pajamas.

personally. i adore this.

a man in a suit is much more attractive than one in a t-shirt and jeans

 this might be the reason i love pre 1960 movies so much.

holler.

like your shoes, love your hair.

today i got my hair cut.
four or so inches off
sounds like a lot but my hair was insanely long
so it's not very noticeable. sadly.
i'm a bit.. well possessive of my hair. so when the time comes along for a nice trim, i kind of.. freak.
my mom told me my hair is completely damaged and i really need a good cut.
she told me not to be afraid
so i tried not to be
at first it was only two inches, didn't seem short enough, so i told her to cut off another inch or two.
still not short enough.
another inch or two please?
it's completely healthy, i will miss all my split ends to pick at when i'm bored
people will still consider my hair long, but to me it feels very short.
i would take a cute picture to show you but.. i just spent an hour in a jeep without doors
it's windblown, messy and gross.

oh and i finally saw inception.
insanity.

steamboatttt

i didn't really give a good post on my trip to steamboat, courtesy of my camera happy mommy, here are some pretty cool pictures.
just to let you know, it's hard to for me to give a real serious smile anymore.
i look like i'm scowling but really, i just didn't want to give the true effort to look cute.

we rode the gondola up to the top of the mountain

it was reallyyy pretty up there

most of our time was filled with.. baseball watching

those are my baseball friends, well mostly just jake.

that's my stud little brother chase

sorry ladies. he still thinks girls have cooties.

oh and we saw a bear.

yes a bear.

there was a big hill behind the baseball park and on the side of that hill was this

basically, it was awesome

this is a packed candy store that was on main street

steamboat springs is a pretty cool place i guess (=

it's been a good day

i always like to run to the mailbox everyday (except sunday of course) to see if my dashing brother wrote to me

of course he never does. strange.

most missionaries love to get letters and write back.

geoff likes to get letters. keep them for a month. write back. then send it off a couple weeks later.

coming home from a week vacation i thought for sure there would be a nice envelope with my name on it.

there was but sadly in the top left hand corner were the words "PLEASANT GROVE HIGH SCHOOL"

a little bit of a let down until my mom called me back and handed me a very bulky magazine

could it be??

i could finally put my worn out, torn and cut, water stained 2010 ikea catalog to rest

2011 ikea catalog

needless to say i've already looked through it three times

even while watching design star

emily, casey, and michael.

best top three i could ever imagine.

nah nah nah nah baseball!

all this week i have been in the great state of colorado
steamboat springs to be exact
which is basically like a poor man's park city but still nice
my youngest brother chase and his stud of a baseball team went there for the triple crown world series
to put it simply
it's kind of a big deal for a 13 year old baseball team.

let's just say:
-ball were thrown and hit (one ball even hit the littlest guy on the team right in the hip, poor kid)

-tears were shed

-loud and angry words were exchanged: two of the coaches were thrown out for yelling at the ump too much, as they were leaving one of the mom's from the other team yelled "i thought mormons weren't supposed to fight?" our whole fan section flipped and started yelling back. but of course we beat them and the last words said and i quote from jake barnhart "THAT'S HOW US MORMONS ROLL!!"

-fourth place medals were given out.

go utah hooks (=